One challenge shared by many parents of gender-creative children is not having the vocabulary to discuss gender with their child. Below are 10 words and phrases commonly used by trans and non-binary folks that will help you better understand and connect with your child.

Children experience gender in all kinds of ways, some of which may leave you feeling confused and uncertain.  It is important to remember that this natural part of child development is not evidence of illness or disorder.  Children notice gender as infants and spend much of their childhood experimenting with gender through play, toys, clothes, and interacting with their peers and caregivers. 

Yes, of course.   When we feel like we’ve lost something, we grieve.  It is a natural part of being alive. You should honor your feelings of loss and sadness. 

Research tells us that children understand gender starting at a very early age.  Between three and five years old, children start to identify with a particular gender (they develop a “gender identity”), which may or may not change over time. Trans and gender-creative kids need their parents' trust and support. 

Even if you’ve taken action to educate yourself about gender and create a supportive and affirming environment for your child, you still may have family members who don’t understand or who actively oppose your efforts to honor and celebrate your child.